Piranha 2010

Horrorphile

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Piranha (2010)

August 26th 2010 01:53

Wow! Alexandre Aja’s 3D remake (his second after the excellent The Hills Have Eyes) of Joe Dante’s Roger Corman-produced Piranha (1978) is sensational! It’s a spectacular piece of super-trash, an adult cartoon; hard candy for the horrorphiles. If you like your gore extreme, if you (shamelessly) dig gratuitous female nudity, if you appreciate a slick, severed-tongue-in-cheek indulgence in All-American pop culture dumbness directed by a young talented European, Piranha (2010) is the flick for you.

Elizabeth Shue as Julie

There is very little of John Sayles original screenplay that Pete Goldfinger and Josh Stolberg have incorporated into their script. There’s still a lake and there’s still mutant fish (well, sort of). The original resort and summer camp has been changed to Spring Break celebrations. And that’s about it. The original movie featured popular B-movie actors from the 60s and 70s (Barbara Steele, Bradford Dillman, Paul Bartel, Dick Miller, Kevin McCarthy, Heather Menzies), so Aja has filled the remake with several well-known character actors, such as Richard Dreyfuss, playing Hooper from Jaws (1975), Elizabeth Shue, Ving Rhames, Christopher Lloyd, Dina Meyer, plus a cameo from Eli Roth (as wet t-shirt host), and Jerry O’Connell channeling Joe Francis, the mogul behind the Girls Gone Wild porn site.

Piranha 2010 Steven R. McQueen and Jessica Szohr

Steven R. McQueen as Jake and Jessica Szohr as Kelly

The premise to the remake is stupidly simple: earthquake beneath Lake Victoria, Arizona, opens a huge crevice on the lake bed which when explored by Sam (Ricardo Chavira) and Paula (Dina Meyer) reveals a massive cavern and thousands of prehistoric piranha spawn. Unsurprisingly, neither of the marine biologists survives, but one of the ferocious fish is captured and taken to Mr. Goodman (Christopher Lloyd) who is more than a little fascinated.

Piranha 2010 Kelly Brook and Riley Steele

Wild Wild Girls Danni (Kelly Brook) and Crystal (Riley Steele)

Meanwhile adolescent opportunist Jake (Steven R. McQueen), skips babysitting his kid brother and sister to accept an offer from porn director Derrick Jones (Jerry O’Connell) to play location scout on the lake, on board a cruiser with voluptuous Wild Wild Girls Danni (Kelly Brook) and Crystal (Riley Steele). His own love interest, the spunky, but aloof Kelly (Jessica Szohr), takes matters into her own hands and joins the raunch expedition. With Spring Break mayhem on the lakefront, Jake’s sheriff mom, Julie (Elizabeth Shue) and deputy Fallon (Ving Rhames), have their hands full. That is until the piranha situation is fully revealed, and then the mayhem turns to full-blown carnage. Yeah!

Derrick (Jerry O'Connell) gets salty with Crystal

Piranha is shameless exploitation of the “finest” order. It combines the nudity of Spring Break (ta-ta’s galore) and Wild Wild Girls shenanigans (full frontal underwater ballet, I kid you not!) with no-holds-barred horror violence (featuring special make-up effects dudes Greg Nicotero and Howard Berger’s best work ever). There's classic children in jeopardy, and horrendous rampaging speedboat carnage, plus a couple of classy shots indeed: a severed penis sinking, then gulped down and regurgitated by a piranha, and Kelly vomiting up tequila and champagne into the camera in 3D! This is one of the movies of the year, no butts about it. And for tidy work, the movie’s last shot is a sly nod to the original’s Z-grade sequel.

Dying to get wet

The cinematography is worth noting; a vibrant colour palette that gives the movie a gloriously bubblegum look. There wasn’t a single girl in a black bikini, or guy in dark board shorts. There’s violet, pink, orange (Spring Break DJ is spinning orange vinyl), blue, lime, yellow, … and red. Oh, yes, there’s a lot of red. There’s all that tan skin, and then there’s all that tattered flesh; ripped, torn and gnawed bodies. It’s so freakishly over-the-top that it becomes less genuinely shocking, and borderline hilarious. Maybe that's why the movie has managed to escape an MPAA rating of NC-17. Either that, or the executive producers (in this case the powerful Weinstein brothers) bought the R-rating. Apparently that happens. There certainly hasn’t been an R-rated movie like this before. And I say, bring it on!

Deputy Fallon (Ving Rhames) gets pro-active

Piranha won’t be everyone’s cup of tequila. The trashy, exploitative elements may rub some folk up the wrong way, but hey, it’s meant to be savoured in this way, with a lick of salt, a wedge of lime, some popcorn, and whatever else you can purloin or imbibe, if you get my irresponsible drift. This is an unbridled, big-budget (actually not huge, around $US22m) grindhouse flick in 3D (well technically it was shot in 2D and converted), and a gleeful return to form for Alexandre Aja after the dreadful Mirrors (2008). Strip off, jump in, the water’s real warm!

Jessica and fish, up close and personal, in a scene not in the movie

Here’s the trailer (with not a single drop of blood in sight!):

Fish food

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Posted By: Bryn - Category: movie reviews

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Comments

27 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Matt Shea

August 26th 2010 02:15

Ha - good to see you making the most of the ad ban, Bryn. I've started hearing great things about this, which is a shame in a way because I passed on the preview, assuming it was going to be awful. Really looking forward to checking it out.

Comment by Deni

August 26th 2010 02:23

Abstract Magick
Cinema Herald

Ewww, a severed penis sinking but not a breast implant? If that's the case, it's not trashy enough.

Comment by JM Van Horn

August 26th 2010 03:02

Gamer Hints

I have to stay when I first heard this was coming out I was a bit excited. The more trailers I have seen, along with the reviews, this is a movie I am going to see this week for sure.

Comment by Bryn

August 26th 2010 03:03

Horrorphile

Matt, indulge my man, indulge!

Deni, Yes, silicon breast implants from Crystal rise to the surface like jellyfish! Thanks for reminding me! Mo' trashy!

Comment by David O'Connell

August 26th 2010 04:18

20/20 Filmsight
Screen Fanatic

Mighty fine work there mate. It's a little scary how many thumbs up this thing's getting all across the globe. Must be something in the water..........

Comment by Bryn

August 26th 2010 04:42

Horrorphile

It was never gonna be the Next Great Horror Movie. Let's face it, the original was a B-movie with dodgy special effects, so here's to Aja taking the B-movie ethic, throwing in some OTT gore (cos there's the specials now to do it well), and running headlong into the surf with it. This is my pick for most enjoyable deep trash of the year.

Comment by Janice H.

August 26th 2010 04:45

Exploring the Paranormal

After seeing the trailers on TV and talking to others that have seen it.......I can honesty say it is pure trash. A campy, outdated reason to get people all excited about nothing. I am glad I won't be wasting my money on seeing that.

Comment by Bryn

August 26th 2010 06:44

Horrorphile

Janice, each to their own, I refer to this as super-trash; a big budget rollercoaster ride of unbridled genre indulgence and exploitation. It's not campy, and gorehounds have plenty to be excited about. As for outdated ...? In the current climate for horror this movie couldn't be more trendy, even progressive (as it pushes the R-rating as far as it will go) if it tried.
By the way, your jack o' lantern avatar creeps me out!

Comment by Bryn

August 26th 2010 06:47

Horrorphile

borneoman, the fish food pic is real, they actually had real piranha eat the extras for the movie

Comment by Janice H.

August 26th 2010 16:57

Exploring the Paranormal

Bryn, I understand where you are coming from with your review, just keep in mind that I am only 1 of the 2 females to comment on it so far. Nude women are not my idea of selling a movie.

"Real fish food"..........LOL (head desk, head desk.........)

Thanks for the comment on my avatar...I aim to please.

Comment by Anonymous

August 26th 2010 18:08

Maybe it will beb worth seeing..The previews looked horrible I was planning on not seeing it

Comment by James Rickard

August 26th 2010 19:29

unlucky_ fishermen.com
Angling Fish
Check this out...

I haven't seen this one yet but I've decided I have to just because it so exploitative! As I always say, it will sharpen my critical eye. I'll wait until a second run or maybe even DVD.

Comment by ShaunK

August 26th 2010 22:52

Screen Adventure

Hey Bryn - thanks for the mammaries.

Nice ~~tits...er...jugs, boobs~~---I mean review

As tempting as it all is - I'm just going through a phase at the moment where I have no desire to see this.

Comment by Bryn

August 27th 2010 00:49

Horrorphile

Janice,
It doesn't actually bother me in the slightest who comments or doesn't comment; in fact 90% of my readers never comment, but I know thousands are reading, and that's what counts. Thanks for commenting though!

Exploitation/grindhouse flicks are all about the lurid appeal of sex and violence, that's what sells them. And as my blog banner says "high art - deep trash" ... I make no apologies for my diverse tastes.

And for what it's worth, the nudity in Piranha is completely in context: Spring Break exhibitionism and the filming of a Wild Wild Girls (aka Girls Gone Wild) video. Gratuitous? Probably, but not unnecessary.

Comment by JohnDoe

August 29th 2010 15:36

Film & TV on DVD

The trailer for this made it like great fun and Im glad that it seems to deliver on its meager aspirations.

The original is such a fun spoof of Jaws with a sly social commentary. It rules that Dreyfuss turns up and hey, I'm not opposed to eye ballin' Kelly's Brooks either

I am not a big fan of Aja, (Haute Tension was fun if deeply flawed, just watched P2 which was just plain silly) but this seems like the kind of material he should excel at.

Comment by Tracie.kj

August 30th 2010 00:13

Afer your review I had to see this movie and I loved it!!! Thanks Bryn other wise I would have never seen it on the big screen!

Comment by Bryn

August 31st 2010 00:55

Horrorphile

Tracie, awesome super-trash huh?!

Comment by Bryn

August 31st 2010 00:59

Horrorphile

JD, it certainly doesn't possess any of Sayles social commentary, well, unless you consider Spring Break a metaphor for America's reckless mainstreaming of porn .... LOL
I wasn't such a fan of Haute Tension, I liked the first half.
I reviewed P2, I didn't know he directed it.
I really liked his remake of Hills Have Eyes ... but I thought Mirrors sucked big time!

Comment by JohnDoe

August 31st 2010 02:15

Film & TV on DVD

Aja only wrote P2, he didn't Direct it. But I still see it as an example of his flaws which are best summed up as not realizing the limitations of the material. That's why Piranha being clear cut trash will;suit his strengths which is gory follow thru. The only reason to watch P2 was the enthusiastic physical harm which entertained.

Comment by Tracie.kj

August 31st 2010 02:57

Absolutley 'tit-a-licious'!!

Comment by Bryn

August 31st 2010 05:03

Horrorphile

JD, he's handling the B-movie remakes well.

Tracie, indeed!! Ta-ta-ta's!!!!

Comment by jon

September 1st 2010 22:22

Personals
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Jon's Bookmarks

Boobies removed -- sorry Bryn.
Jon.

Comment by Bryn

September 2nd 2010 00:03

Horrorphile

What?! But Google's already pulled advertising! No I'm censored by Orble?! This is not fair. The pic was totally in-keeping with the nature of the movie. We need to talk. I'm not happy Jan.

Comment by Kelly Wand

September 6th 2010 10:31

Sprocket Holed

Machete wishes it was this movie. Taps into our primal fears of Spring Break.

Comment by Bryn

September 7th 2010 05:08

Horrorphile

Kelly, hahaha! Nice comment. Sounds like you were disappointed by Machete then. It hasn't opened down under yet ... I'm hoping Eli Roth decides to make Thanksgiving, and make it as disturbing and offensive as the mock trailer suggested.

Comment by Kelly Wand

September 8th 2010 04:22

Sprocket Holed

Machete's a bore; Piranha's good stupid fun (and it even has a clever, subtle subtext, where Machete has no viewpoint on immigration or machetes or anything at all).

I also wouldn't mind seeing the "Don't" feature.

Comment by Bryn

September 8th 2010 05:00

Horrorphile

What a shame Rodriguez dropped the blade, er, ball then ... I really enjoyed Planet Terror.
Yes Piranha is indeed damn good stupid fun!
Yeah, Edgar Wright should do Don't!
Apparently Eli Roth put together a compilation called Trailer Trash ... Have you seen it?

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