July 2009 - Horrorphile

Horrorphile

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Horrorphile - July 2009

100 Feet

July 30th 2009 00:51

I’ll try not to waste too much of your time or mine with this review. Writer/director Eric Red has had a very patchy career. Personally I think he’s rested on his writing laurels, chiefly too excellent screenplays; The Hitcher (1986) and Near Dark (1987), and hasn’t managed to reach those giddy heights of dramatic intensity ever since. His werewolf movie, Bad Moon (1996), which he also directed was a promising, but ultimately disappointing lycanthropic affair which suffered greatly at the hands of American censors, not too mention a curious, but not altogether successful narrative perspective.

100 Feet (2008) is the first movie he’s directed since Bad Moon, and it shows. If you don’t count the re-write/remake The Hitcher (2007), this is also the first movie he’s written since Bad Moon, and it shows even more. What the fuck’s he been doing for the past twelve years?! He’s been quoted saying “I love horror movies because they have such tremendous energy, and a lot of them don't go far enough. I've attempted to give my pictures a real human level.” Well, he’s botched that attitude up something chronic with 100 Feet, a truly dreadful piece of filmmaking.

100 Feet Famke Janssen and Bobby Cannovale

Famke Janssen as Marnie and Bobby Cannovale as Shanks

The movie is essentially a vehicle for Famke Janssen who stars as Marnie Watson, a woman who’s been convicted of killing her policeman husband, Mike (Michael Paré, in an utterly thankless role), in self defence. She’s done some time, but is now had her sentence deferred to house arrest, so she’s delivered back to her brownstone in Brooklyn, NYC where she has to wear an electronic ankle bracelet and cannot move beyond one hundred from the base unit which is padlocked at the top of the stairs (and, very unnecessarily, sports a large flashing red light). Her escorting officer, Shanks (Bobby Cannavale), also happens to be her dead husband’s ex-partner (as if he’d be in charge of her!), and he’s pretty embittered.

Ed Westwick as Joey

Turns out Mike’s ghost is dwelling in the house and is dead set on making Marnie’s life a misery. He’s a very violent apparition with a face that is either a pale white or blood red mask of rage. Marnie is thrown around like a rag doll, but usually only ends up with a small bruise or a slight graze (despite the severity of the supernatural assaults). Mike wants bloody revenge, but Marnie wants to stay in the house, so it becomes one hell of a domestic battle. Throw into the mix a handsome young man Joey (Ed Westwick), barely out of his teens, who starts by delivering Marnie her groceries, but ends up in her bed (of course), and brief appearances by Marnie’s older sister Frances (Patricia Charbonnneau), and a priest (Kevin Geer), who immediately makes confessional demands on Marnie.

Argh! Eric Red what have you put me in?!

Joey feels Mike's wrath

This is a ludicrous script and I’m amazed it got given the green light, but as the credits rolled I was given a bit of a heads up; all the interiors (and the movie is almost entirely set within Marnie’s three-storey apartment) were shot in Budapest with a Hungarian crew, with a handful of New York exteriors (no doubt shot with a second unit). This “co-pro” deal was probably the only way Eric Red was going to get his movie made. Perhaps Famke Janssen signed on because she really liked The Hitcher and Near Dark? She’s certainly done herself no favours here.

The tedium sends Famke to sleep

There are too many annoying things about this move too bother mentioning, suffice to say I was groaning ten minutes into the movie (the opening sequence of Marnie traveling in the back seat of the cop car was the only half-decent sequence, and that aint’ sayin’ much at all!) The special effects were very dodgy, many of them badly staged. The one good gore moment almost seemed out of place with the rest of the movie, as it was so graphic.

100 Feet Bobby Cannovale and Famke Janssen

Eric adds pyrotechnics in to liven things up ... but it's too late mate

To fans of The Hitcher and Near Dark, and to a lesser degree, Bad Moon, don’t waste your money or time with 100 Feet. To use a fittingly bad pun, your best move is to keep your distance from this crime against the horror genre.

Here's the trailer which makes the movie look a tad better than it really is:

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THE STATE OF THE BAIT

July 21st 2009 00:21

There are comin’ in thick and fast; Halloween is not too far off and American distributors know this is a time to make a killing at the box office for horror flicks. So without further bloody adieu here are five trailers of varying calibre with my two or three cents thrown in for bloody measure.

First up is Rob Zombie’s continued travesty; Halloween II (2009), or H2 as some of the stupid marketing refers to it. As if Zombie’s dire remake of John Carpenter’s seminal slasher flick wasn’t enough, which single-handedly ruined any kind of nightmarish mystery associated with the boogeyman we know as Michael Myers. Donald Pleasence eats Malcolm McDowell for breakfast. And Tyler Mane is no Nick Castle.

For this remake sequel Zombie kicks off in the hospital from the original sequel and then takes the story into his own hands by jumping ahead two years to further destroy any shred of respect for the original and have Michael Myers plan a family reunion via psycho prompting from his dead mother (played of course by Zombie’s trailer trash wife Sheri Moon).

The House on Sorority Row (1983) was apparently an above average slasher flick. I’ve never seen it so I can’t comment there, but Quentin Tarantino selected it for his inaugural Quentin Tarantino Film Fest in Austin, 1996. However Tarantino’s taste in movies is questionable, since he loves trash and trash is an oh so very particular taste.

The remake, Sorority Row (2009), by debut feature director Stewart Hendler (who it seems is now working on a remake of one of my favourite medieval movies Flesh [plus sign] Blood! Nooo!) looks set to follow the original reasonable closely, except the initial prank involves a fellow student instead of a teacher. Carrie Fisher (who obviously needs to pay some bills) plays a teacher, whilst the rest of Theta Pi sorority is made up of young up-and-coming starlets including Briana, the daughter of Greg BJ & the Bear Evigan and Rumor, the daughter of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore. Rather curiously the MPAA censors warn that the movie contains strong bloody violence, language, sexuality/nudity and … wait for it … partying, goodness gracias me!

The Final Destination (2009) is apparently the final sequel in the successful creative graphic death series Final Destination (2000), which had two sequels, one every three years. Now three years after Final Destination 3 (2006) it’s back to director David R. Ellis (who alternated with James Wong). Instead of calling it Final Destination 4: The Final Chapter (oops, wrong series), a “The” is added to give the movie a prefix finality (to be pronounced as: The Final Destination).

The added bonus to this installment is that the movie is in 3D. Cool, I like 3D. All movies should be in 3D. Of course, being a Final Destination movie there will no doubt be a lot of stuff being thrown at the camera and that can get a bit overwhelming and frankly, rather tedious. Still I like the first big disaster and major body count of the movie which takes place at an Indy 500 style car race. Let’s hope the creative deaths really shine in the most gruesome and spectacular way possible. Of course if the movie does really well we’ll probably get Final Destination 5: A New Beginning. Hmmm, sound familiar?

Zombieland (2009) has its rotting tongue deep in its cheek. This kinda looks like a spoof on reality shows and carnivals. Directed by Rubin Fleischer and not to be confused with a straight movie of the same name starring Brad Dourif. Woody Harrelson plays an AK-toting bad ass keen to tag the Zombie Kill o’ the Week. Bill Murray plays a zombie. Pretty young things Amber Heart and Emily Stone co-star, along with Little Miss Sunshine Abagail Breslin, and Jesse Eisenberg. This could very well be the American answer to the brilliant Shaun of the Dead (2004), but who really knows. I quite like the trailer, but the state of the bait isn’t any indication on the calibre of the feature. The question I really have to ask though is when will the glut of zombie movies subside?! Will George Romero have the final say with his much anticipated next (final??) installment in his own series, Island of the Dead, or will it be Dusk of the Dead, or Twilight of the Dead, or simply ... Of the Dead. Hmmmm.

And finally … Martin Scorsese, the modern American master of cinema turns his attention to a horror movie. Shutter Island (2009), based on the novel by Dennis Lahane. Well, to be honest, it’s more of a supernatural thriller, but by the looks of the excellent, albeit rather too revealing, trailer there’s gonna be some serious thrills and spills. Leonardo DiCaprio perfects a thick Eastern twang, and his co-stars include Mark Ruffalo, Ben Kingsley, Michelle Williams, Emily Mortimer, Patricia Clarkson, Elias Koteas, Ted Levine, and 80-year-old Max Von Sydow. Whew, what a cast!

This is a tale of unadulterated creepy-ass madness. Production values and shooting style remind me of his remake of Cape Fear (1991), and looks set to be channeling a Hitchcockian visual sense as well. I’ve been waiting for Scorsese to have another go at scaring his audience. This looks like one not be missed on the big screen!

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The Midnight Meat Train

July 20th 2009 01:14

I’ve been intending to read Clive Barker’s three volume collection of short stories, Books of Blood for a long time, especially after enjoying Hellbound: Hellraiser II (1988), which along with Hellraiser (1987), was based on the short story The Hellbound Heart. Having now seen The Midnight Meat Train (2008) I really need to track down copies of the books. Stephen King was famously quoted as saying “I’ve seen the future of horror, and his name is Clive Barker.”

Not all movie adaptations of Clive Barker’s work are successful; so much of his writing is not easily digestible in the form of cinema. But, like Guillermo del Toro, the man is blessed with a fierce imagination and is not afraid to delve into the Darkness. Clive Barker has a very twisted take on life and death and the carnal desire that courses through our veins. The Midnight Meat Train may sound like a ridiculously B-grade piece of crap from its title, but the movie is far from conventional, as it thunders along on the thin ice of Argento-esque logic. Don't let the title put you off.

Bradley Cooper as Leon

Leon (Bradley Cooper) is a photographer keen to show the city as the dark and grim place that it is, and desperate for recognition. He’s given creative impetus from his girlfriend Maya (Leslie Bibb) and a further prodding from a staunch art gallery curator Susan Hoff (Brooke Shields) and his friend Jurgis (Roger Bart). But to be exhibited he needs to impress Hoff and get his hands dirty; capture the danger from the front line.

Leslie Bibb as Maya

Leon takes the bull by the horns, but in doing so becomes embroiled in the murder of a model on the city’s subway. Detective Hadley (Barbara Eve Harris) is intrigued by his story, but detached. Maya becomes concerned when Leon starts to exhibit signs of obsessive behaviour. There is a serial killer on the loose, a butcher by the name of Mahogany, who rides the last train, and Leon is determined to prove this. At all cost.

Vinnie Jones as Mahogany

Now this might sound all frightfully ordinary for a horror premise, but trust me, The Midnight Meat Train is not. It begins in an orthodox fashion, but becomes steadily stranger and stranger. The movie’s final ten or so minutes push the entire movie into the realm of surrealist nightmare. It’s pure Clive Barker, and in a rather unusual example for Hollywood, the result is a highly memorable movie experience, albeit not for all tastes.

Nothing more gross than blood in the eye

The Midnight Meat Train Vinnie Jones, Stephanie Mace

Leigh (Stephanie Mace) gets more than a little blood in her eye

Several elements lift this movie several notches above your standard stalk’n’slash fare, most notable the Japanese director, Ryûhei Kitamura, now based in America. He made the cult zombie-martial arts flick Versus (2000) and later the post-modern samurai flick Azumi. His visual style in The Midnight Meat Train is brilliant. At times it feels like a video clip, but the stylistics actually suit the surreal narrative. There is a heavy reliance on CGI, especially the blood and gore, and my initial reaction was, “What a cop out!” However I warmed to its use, and in most instances I realised the only way to depict the level of extreme graphic violence was to use CGI. There is excellent prosthetic work also. Kitamura adds an exotic richness to the mise-en-scene that is missing from all too many American productions. This is a compelling Asian-American movie, and is all the better for it. The ending reminded me of Lucio Fulci’s The Beyond.

One of the reasons that I enjoyed this movie so much, apart from the visual style, was the gaps in the narrative. This might sound strange, but not answering all the questions that were posed in one way or another provided the movie with a powerful sense of the arcane. Like a true nightmare, the descent Leon makes into madness and mayhem becomes overwhelming. It’s like he sells his soul to the Devil, who finally claims him in the most gruesome and grotesque way imaginable. Yes, there are some superb moments of pure unbridled horror.

Mahogany's made a bit of a mess

Vinnie Jones plays Mahogany, the silent butcher who rides the train clutching his large old-fashioned doctor’s bag, and brandishing a nasty steel meat tenderiser. With only one word of dialogue (right near the end of the movie), Jones’s menacing facial expressions speak volumes. John Curran plays the subway train driver and he too possesses a chilling presence that is only fully revealed at movie’s end. Although it was shot in Los Angeles, the movie’s city location is hard to determine. It feels like NYC, but those aren’t Manhattan subways. Grant Station is the key locale, and the subway line is called the Green Line.

The MIdnight Meat Train Vinnie Jones, Bradley Cooper

Leon bears the brunt of Mahogany's meat mullet

The Midnight Meat Train is incredibly brutal and visceral, and most definitely not for the easily squeamish. Hardened horrorphiles will relish and savour the exquisite gore (even if much of it has been CGIed) and nightmare imagery. There is a palpable sense of darkness that permeates the movie, from those fantastic shots of the train hurtling through the subterranean passageways; to the disquieting sexuality that rears its head from time to time (the engagement ring scene will provoke questions). Clive Barker has always been interested in blurring the sex and death angle, and in this movie the sexual symbolism is cleverly integrated (much to the skill of director Kitamura and screenwriter Jeff Buhler).

The Midnight Meat Train suffered poor distribution in the States being relegated to a small number of the dollar theatres (modern equivalent to the grindhouse cinemas) which is why it’s taken ages to get to Australia. Shame I didn’t get to see this on the big screen as it would’ve packed even more of a savage punch.

Here's the trailer:

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Girls and Corpses

July 17th 2009 00:30

The same dodgy mate of mine that unearthed the disgusting snake-cam worm business in that North Carolina sewer just sent me a link to this relatively new publication, Girls & Corpses. Oh dear me! We both agreed: This is so wrong on so many levels. I found myself clicking on link after link after link on the online site like it was some kind of horrendous train wreck and I couldn’t get enough of surveying the carnage.

Girls and Corpses featuring Dawna of the Dead

But seriously, let’s get down to brass tacks; this kind of combo does nothing for me. Really. Truly. Deeply. I was never a fan of that English claptrap magazine Loaded, nor any of the others that followed in its sullied wake; Maxim, Ralph, FHM. Sure, I’ve been known to enjoy the scantily-clad, buxom, wannabe porn stars, er women, that spread-eagle themselves across their pages, but as for the combo of sex and gross-out humour, of boys toys and drinking games, it just bores me. I find most of it puerile and adolescent (I know, kinda hypocritical of me as I’m an adolescent-at-heart in other areas

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Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

July 16th 2009 03:15

I’m in a slightly cynical and impatient mood. So here are my succinct two-cents on the sixth installment of the adventures of Harry Potter, orphan, wizard student extraordinaire, The Chosen One ... Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009)

The opening sequence which follows the trail of three Death Eaters as they spiral down out of the clouds and hurtles toward the narrow streets of London, then careers at breakneck speed dodging double-decker buses and buildings before streaking down the narrow cobblestone street of Diagon Alley and finally exploding into the side of an antique store, is brilliant, and worth the extra ticket price to see it in IMAX 3D. It’s a pity the whole movie isn’t in 3D. It’s kind of ridiculous having the first 12 minutes in 3D and then you have to watch the remaining two-a-quarter hours in standard 2D

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Les Lèvres Rouges (Daughters of Darkness)

July 14th 2009 23:47

You can’t go past a moody German/Belgium/French psychosexual vampire movie from the early 70s. Oooo la la! Yes, Harry Kümel’s art-schlock cult classic is a rare and fabulous creature; self-consciously delicate and artfully fragile, yet infused with an inner darkness and disquietingly dysfunctional characters. Although shot in English language its original French title translates as The Red Lips, however it is more famously known by its international title, Daughters of Darkness (1971).

Stefan (John Karlen) and Valerie (Danielle Ouimet) are newlyweds holidaying through Europe. They book into the Hotel Ostend in Beligum where they are immediately spotted by Countess Elizabeth Bathory (Delphine Seyrig) and her assistant (read: lover) Ilona (Andrea Rau). The Countess is smitten with silky blonde Valerie. The concierge (Paul Esser) is intrigued by Ms. Bathory, as she has the same name and looks exactly like a woman who stayed at the hotel 40 years earlier when he was a young bellboy. The Countess tells him he must be confused

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Hush

July 14th 2009 00:15

From the same UK indie production company that made Donkey Punch (2008), Warp X, comes another low-budget horror-thriller, riding the suspense levels up as high as the filmmakers can muster. Although the direction and editing are tight, the performances are average, and the screenplay is so slender it borders on anorexic. What am I saying?! Hush (2008) was riddled with holes.

Zakes (um, is that meant to sound like a cross between "Yikes!" and "Zounds!"?) (William Ash) and his girlfriend Beth (Christine Bottomley) are having a lovers’ tiff. They’re driving along the M1 in pouring rain so Zakes can deliver his less than stellar job of putting up advertising posters in service stations. Beth has a less than stellar secret involving an act of indiscretion oh her behalf, but despite her frustration with Zakes she doesn’t disclose it

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BLOOD, SWEAT AND TEARS - Five trailers to sink your teeth into!

July 13th 2009 07:23

I’ve been attending film festivals since I was fifteen. For many years I enjoyed the programme of the Wellington Film Festival of which Bill Gosden was the director. I noticed this year the Wellington Film Festival which kicks off in a few days (now under the umbrella of the multi-city New Zealand International Film Festival) is screening several exciting movies that didn’t play here at the Sydney Film Festival. I'm very much looking forward to seeing these movies in the near future, and hopefully on the big screen!

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Mimic

July 10th 2009 05:08

I saw Mimic (1997) when it came out and found it to be a riveting and fascinating tale of the dangerous warning on genetic tampering. At the time I had a quiet crush on Mira Sorvino, but didn’t register that the director Guillermo del Toro was the same man who’d made the equally fascinating and nightmarish Cronos (1993). Watching Mimic again recently the now familiar love of mutations and darkness, the moist and sticky elements of nightmares that del Toro delves into with glee are all too clear, however overall the movie doesn’t hold up quite as well as I remembered.

A virulent disease carried by the common (American) cockroach is wiping out the children of Manhattan. Dr. Peter Mann (Jeremy Northam) and his girlfriend, entomologist Dr. Susan Tyler (Mira Sorvino) have found a solution. Tyler develops a genetic cockroach mutation that secretes a fluid which kills off the roach population of the city. Although designed to die after one generation the mutant insect thrives, unbeknown to Tyler and the rest of the human inhabitants of the city. Three years later mutilated bodies are discovered around the city. Tyler and Mann are called back in when it’s revealed that the mutant strain hasn’t died off, but as mutated again into evolved into something much more monstrous and deadly

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Drag Me to Hell

July 9th 2009 00:34

I don’t like a lot of what Sam Raimi has made. I’ll certainly acknowledge his contribution to the modern horror movie, and I’ll even champion The Evil Dead (1981) as one of the best of its kind (a low-budget visceral shocker par excellence), but I have to keep in mind that Raimi also fell prey to the Hollywood machine Big Time with all the excessive trappings.

I’m not a fan of the Spider-Man movies; they’re overblown and too glossy for my tastes. But this was evident with Dark Man (1990), a vivid mess of a movie. I’m not a fan of the Evil Dead sequels, and it disheartens me greatly that Raimi is writing, producing and directing a remake of The Evil Dead to be released next year. Why?! Are his kids that demanding

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Dead Birds

July 8th 2009 00:28

Not sure how I come across this straight-to-DVD movie because it certainly wasn’t the dreadful cover art that caught my eye. Dead Birds (2004) is the debut feature for director Alex Turner, a horror-western (not too many in that particular sub-genre, and even less that are actually any good) that sports an unusually strong cast and, for the most part, a genuinely creepy atmosphere. The movie smacks of Euro-Asian elements despite being set in Alabama, 1863.

Shot in the blink of an eye, and relying a little too heavily on CGI effects, but also sporting some decent prosthetics too. Now that I think about it, it was the Michael Shannon’s name that drew my attention to this very modestly budgeted flick. Shannon is only a supporting player, but he commands every scene he’s in. Henry Thomas (the boy from E.T., very much an adult now) is William, and it’s his ragtag posse of crooked confederate soldiers that end up holed-up in a haunted plantation mansion after robbing a bank and murdering almost everyone in it (including a little boy outside who gets hit by a stray bullet

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GROTESQUE UNIDENTIFIED LIFE FORM FOUND IN SEWER!

July 2nd 2009 01:45

Okay, this has to be seen to be believed! Oh my God! I’m so grossed out, and yet, utterly fascinated. It looks very convincing, meaning I don’t think it’s a special effects makeup job. But then again, in this day and age, who knows?! I'd like to think it's fake ...

The video clip was brought to my attention by an old friend of mine who’s always had a penchant for digging up the weird and … um … weirder. Cheers mate! You’ve outdone yourself this time, and thanks to youtube for providing the platform to expose this kind of freakydeaky shit. "Shit" being the operative word, since this is a snake-cam in a North Carolina sewer, and what the hell is it?! These unknown organisms seem to be from another world entirely

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Saturn 3

July 1st 2009 01:52

This tragic piece of cosmic debris holds a special place in my cine heart, and it is a fitting week that I review it, if anything just to pay tribute to the svelte sexiness of Farrah Fawcett, because as a movie Saturn 3 (1980) is not very good. It’s deep trash; hopelessly derivative, with a clunky narrative and dodgy special effects. Yet, I can’t shake the movie. I come back to it periodically, mostly out of curiosity, as the movie has a fascinating history.

The basic plot has Benson (Harvey Keitel), a psychopath on a mission, killing Captain James (Douglas Lambert) gruesomely (with little regard for plausibility), then impersonating the astronaut. He travels to Saturn 3 (is it an asteroid or is it Titan, it’s never made clear) with his large trusty canister (which, inexplicably, wasn’t sucked out into space in the bizarre locker-room-cum-airlock). Upon arrival he introduces himself to the two neo-hippie scientists in charge of a large hydroponic research station (Earth is over-populated and food is now being sourced off-world); Adam (Kirk Douglas) and his partner Alex (Farrah Fawcett). There’s also Alex’s mutt, Sally, and a couple of service robots in the facility

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