Horror Movies - Horrorphile

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Horrorphile

GROTESQUE UNIDENTIFIED LIFE FORM FOUND IN SEWER!

July 2nd 2009 01:45

Okay, this has to be seen to be believed! Oh my God! I’m so grossed out, and yet, utterly fascinated. It looks very convincing, meaning I don’t think it’s a special effects makeup job. But then again, in this day and age, who knows?! I'd like to think it's fake ...

The video clip was brought to my attention by an old friend of mine who’s always had a penchant for digging up the weird and … um … weirder. Cheers mate! You’ve outdone yourself this time, and thanks to youtube for providing the platform to expose this kind of freakydeaky shit. "Shit" being the operative word, since this is a snake-cam in a North Carolina sewer, and what the hell is it?! These unknown organisms seem to be from another world entirely.

Ugh! It gives me the heebie-jeebies just thinking about it. I can handle my Rob Bottin special effects, but this stuff just makes me wanna take a damn shower! Just what are those North-Eastern Americans eating??!! Watch at your own nightmare peril.

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Posted By: Bryn - Category: set-pieces

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Saturn 3

July 1st 2009 01:52

This tragic piece of cosmic debris holds a special place in my cine heart, and it is a fitting week that I review it, if anything just to pay tribute to the svelte sexiness of Farrah Fawcett, because as a movie Saturn 3 (1980) is not very good. It’s deep trash; hopelessly derivative, with a clunky narrative and dodgy special effects. Yet, I can’t shake the movie. I come back to it periodically, mostly out of curiosity, as the movie has a fascinating history.

The basic plot has Benson (Harvey Keitel), a psychopath on a mission, killing Captain James (Douglas Lambert) gruesomely (with little regard for plausibility), then impersonating the astronaut. He travels to Saturn 3 (is it an asteroid or is it Titan, it’s never made clear) with his large trusty canister (which, inexplicably, wasn’t sucked out into space in the bizarre locker-room-cum-airlock). Upon arrival he introduces himself to the two neo-hippie scientists in charge of a large hydroponic research station (Earth is over-populated and food is now being sourced off-world); Adam (Kirk Douglas) and his partner Alex (Farrah Fawcett). There’s also Alex’s mutt, Sally, and a couple of service robots in the facility.

Farrah Fawcett as Alex

While contact with Earth is blocked due to a 22-day eclipse, Benson aka James makes immediate lustful eyes for Alex (hey, who wouldn’t?) and repeatedly tries, in the most uncouth and vain manner, to get into Alex’s jumpsuit, much to Adam’s restrained chagrin. While he bides his time Benson assembles and initiates the helper, Hector, the first in the "Demi-God" series of robots. Hector is an eight-foot tall humanoid hulk with red and blue liquid in tubing running from foot to head (well, actually Hector doesn’t have a head, instead a pair of electric eyes on a swivel-stick), and metal casing protecting the canister Benson brought with him which is revealed to hold a massive amount of brain tissue taken from fetuses – thus perfect for programming. However, Benson prefers to have Hector operate from direct input; a flesh-jack at the base of Benson’s neck (the so-called cortical stack, if you’ve read the brilliant sf novel Altered Carbon), thus Benson communicates and instructs Hector, brain to brain.

Kirk Douglas as Adam

Of course this means Hector is infused with Benson’s unhinged, homicidal nature, so it isn’t long before Hector is on the rampage and although Benson is accountable, the huge whirring killer-bot is out of his control. First to go is Sally. Adam manages to knock Hector out of commission, and pulls rank (he’s a Major, and believes Benson to be Captain James), ordering Benson to dis-assemble Hector and return to Earth. But Hector's brain uses a bit of “Bluetooth” hanky-panky and instructs the service robots to re-assemble the parts. Then it’s back to the terrorising game.

Harvey Keitel as Benson

Saturn 3 was the project of legendary production designer John Barry (Star Wars, Superman), who envisioned a lush and dark precautionary tale of the future. He provided the story and was the movie’s initial director. However the budget was cut back during production because of spiraling costs on Raise the Titantic! (from the same film company). According to imdb Barry was fired after creative disputes with Kirk Douglas, however I’ve also read that it was Barry's untimely death during production that led to legendary director Stanley (Singin' in the Rain) Donen take over. Donen apparently wanted to downplay the exploitation elements of the movie, so unfortunately a couple of intense scenes were cut before release: Adam and Alex killing Benson in a fantasy sequence (possibly after dropping the classic Blue Dreamer pills) and a rather gory sequence where Hector dismantles Benson’s body, which would explain the memorable shot of Hector with Benson’s severed head slotted over his/its own swivel-stick head.

Catwalk fashion production or spacecraft departure foyer?

Captain James suited up, about to die

The last quarter of the movie is incredibly clunky and the ending is very abrupt. There’s also a big jump in the narrative time-line which leaves the viewer going “Huh?”. With seven assistant directors and six assistant editors I can’t help but wonder what the movie’s original rough cut was like; no doubt far more interesting, visceral and dramatic. The screenplay was penned by renowned British author Martin Amis, although you certainly wouldn’t pick it.

Saturn 3 Harvey Keitel, Farrah Fawcett, Kirk Douglas

Benson introduces Alex and Adam to Hector

However, for all the dodgy parts of the movie there are elements that are intriguing, even cool. While the opening spacecraft sequence is shamelessly lifted wholesale from Star Wars, the font used for the title which precedes it is way funky. Benson’s approach to the asteroid/moon is B-grade indeed, but the decontamination chamber effect is visually striking. Adam and Alex’s outfits - costumes really - are risible (Farrah’s wardrobe and hair design is lifted straight from the pages of Vogue, yet her character is meant to be entirely naïve), yet Benson’s green spacesuit is very cyber-industrial-chic. The design of Hector, apparently inspired by the drawings of Da Vinci, is creepy and menacing, but unfortunately the “metal” is about as plastic-looking as you can get.

Benson instructs Hector to remove a live chip from Alex's eye

There are only three main actors (if you don’t count Douglas Lambert’s token appearance), and the performances are uniformly horrible. Not surprisingly the movie was nominated for three Golden Raspberry awards: Worst Actor (Douglas), Worst Actress (Fawcett) and Worst Movie. Kirk Douglas pulls more ridiculous facial expressions than a clown, Farrah spends more time delivering a wimpy “Uh” or “Oh” rather than her soft-spoken drivel, while Harvey Keitel appears to be sleepwalking, and, very oddly, had his voice re-dubbed by British actor Roy Dotrice. Curiously there is no complete cast list credited at the end of the movie, so Douglas Lambert is never credited, and the poor fool who stumbled around inside Hector was never given due credit.

Saturn 3 Kirk Douglas, Farrah Fawcett, Harvey Keitel

Adam challenges Hector to a game of chess

Adam gets down and dirty ...

Still, Elmer Bernstein’s score is okay, and hey, you get to see a brief glimpse of Farrah’s lovely naked breast, and then her sumptuous nude body in silhouette (which set my pubescent mind racing when I first saw it)! Mind you, you’re also subjected to 64-year-old Kirk wrestling Harvey buck naked. Yes, Saturn 3 seriously malfunctions, its body dragged around like Achilles did through Troy with the slain body of Hector; Martin Amis throwing a little literary metaphoric weight when he has Adam explain to Alex the connection. The movie was shamelessly trying to capitalise on the horror-sf success of Alien (1979), yet has none of Ridley’s expert command over look, feel, mood, and tone. Some of Hector’s robot moves are impressive executed, and the gore effects, especially the severing of Benson’s hand and Captain James’ demise, are decent, but the rest of the effects are mutton dressed as lamb (crazy to think the movie was released in a 70mm blow-up!)

... and Alex is forced to restrain him in her teddy

I think I’ve rambled enough about this piece of space junk. However I only hope one day a special edition gets released with all the deleted scenes, director’s commentary, and Harvey and/or Kirk commentary. It might sound out of place, but the movie deserves better treatment. The DVD I have is a disappointing full-frame, no frills release that has the audacity to put “Screen Classics” on the cover. Bizarre.

Even better; a remake, or should I say re-envisioning, with a bigger cast, and more adult content. I might even start work on a spec screenplay myself!

Here's the original trailer (featuring Farrah in alluring fetish attire, cut from the release):

Curious French poster

Several fonts were used for promotion, but the best was the actual title credit

Alex's ultra-stylish off-world tattoo design

Farrah Fawcett R.I.P. 1957 - 2009

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Posted By: Bryn - Category: movie reviews

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Otesánek (Little Otik)

June 30th 2009 07:00

Another strange, grotesque and disturbing tale of domesticity gone horribly wrong from inspired Czech Republic filmmaker Jan Svankmajer, Little Otik (2000) is based on a Eastern European fairytale, albeit one of the darker, grimmer ones, and although mostly live action it does utilise Svankmajer’s penchant for stop-motion weirdness when it comes to depicting the monstrous eponymous child.

When a couple, Karel (Jan Hartl) and Bozena (Veronika Zilková), learn that they cannot bear any children it causes the wife great distress and in denial she pretends she is pregnant. The husband tries to ease his wife’s suffering by presenting her with a pretend infant which he’s fashioned from a large tree root. She takes to it like a suckling to mother’s milk, which only aggravates the problem.

Veronika Zilkova as Bozena

A supernatural turn of events sees the wooden baby come to life and swiftly starts to eat the couple out of house and home. No amount of milk and baby food is sufficient. Then the poor cat is consumed, and little Otik, or Otesánek, as Karel sarcastically calls it (referring to the dark tale), has grown substantially. Soon enough Bozena is making frequent trips to the local butcher and boiling up large hunks of meat to satisfy their insatiable little ‘un.

Jan Hartl as Karel with Otesánek aka Little Otik

Events take a turn for the worse when the postman and a social worker go missing, and the couple’s neighbour’s become suspicious, especially grumpy veggie caretaker (Dagmar Stríbrná), and precocious young Alzbetka (Kristina Adamcová), who after hearing Karel referring to his child as little Otik, and observing him make a fake phone call to the hospital, makes a connection after reading the ghastly tale of the couple whose conjured baby, Otesánek, eats everything in its path, from its parents, to horses and shepherds, and herds of pigs and sheep. The baby grows to enormous size, and then arrives at a cabbage patch and its fearless grower.

Little Otik is a hungry little boy!

Svankmajer’s movies are curious productions. On one hand they’re brilliantly accomplished on what seems like very modest budgets. On the other they often come across as only semi-professional, shot in standard 1:1.33 ratio, with clunky mise-en-scene (curiously he loves close-ups of mouths) and overdubbing. All his movies use post-synch sound, which does provide a heightened sense of the surreal, making the overall atmosphere feel like a dream, or nightmare to be precise.

Kristina Adamkova as Alzbetka

His casting is spot on, and Little Otik features great performances from the female leads; Zilková, Adamcová and Stríbrná. I’d like to say that the actor playing little Otik steals the show, but he’s simply an animated character, but with spindly roots for fingers and toes, a branch knot for a mouth, with a hideous slavering tongue, crooked teeth and single eye that occasionally pops into the mouth to have a gander. The whole visual concept of little Otik is creepy as hell.

Jitka Smutna as the insistent social worker

Svankmajer, who also penned the screenplay, adapted the tale from the work of a popular 19th Century Czech author called Karel Jaromír Erben. I’m curious if all his so-called fairytales were as twisted and horrible as Little Otik. Certainly Svankmajer was impressed, and it makes sense since his previous movies have been adaptations of the myth of Faust and Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland.

The monster baby from the original fairytale

Speaking of Carroll's Alice, I’ve been excited about Tim Burton’s latest project, although I’ve only just discovered he’s not sticking to the original story. He’s calling it Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland, which doesn’t sit well with me, since he screwed around with Planet of the Apes and it turned out miserably. But more on Burton’s version of Wonderland further down the track.

Here's the trailer (American, but don't let it bother you):

Little Otik DVD is courtesy of Siren Visual, many thanks!

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Q&A with A NIGHT OF HORROR film festival directors Dean Bertram and Lisa Mitchell

June 29th 2009 01:19

This has been a wee while cooking, but finally I got my answers! Back in late March the 4th annual international film festival, A Night Of Horror, screened in Sydney. It was a mix of short films and features, mostly independent productions, many of which were enjoying their premiere screenings. Some directors came all the way from America to present their movies, and in the end an American monster movie took the award for best movie: Splinter (for complete list of award winners click here)

In its first year A Night Of Horror ran for just three nights, now it runs for ten glorious days. It’s a modestly-mounted showcase that is steadily building a reputable name for itself, as well as providing a forum for filmmakers to meet and discuss the genre and the industry. Thank God for the festival team; Dean Dertram, Lisa Mitchell, Grant Bertram, Shane K, Dalibor Backovic, Bryant Johnston, Jack Sargeant, and others, for their dedicated work

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Posted By: Bryn - Category: set-pieces

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Splinter

June 24th 2009 01:39

I missed the screening of Splinter (2008) at the recent A Night Of Horror international film festival here in Sydney. It turned out to win three festival awards; Best Actor (Shea Wigham), Best Special Effects and Best Film. I ended up ordering the DVD from the States, I couldn’t wait for a local release (who knows when that could happen).

I was very impressed indeed. It’s a relatively conservative affair; set almost entirely in and around a lone Oklahoma gas station, with a cast of only six actors, and a running time of just over 80 minutes. But it makes up for its budgetary constraints with a tight script, solid acting from a charismatic cast, and inventive special effects that skillfully blend good old fashioned gruesome prosthetic appliances and sly CGI work. There’s plenty of dark blood and bodily goo, and a few sensationally wince-inducing moments

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Posted By: Bryn - Category: movie reviews

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Martyrs

June 23rd 2009 02:13

Supposedly the word “martyr” is derived from the Latin word for “witness”. They are those rare humans that suffer agonizing pain, but will not be broken, finally seeing beyond death into the mysterious void. Does it exist? Only the martyrs know, but none have ever survived to actually relate their experience, their vision.

Until now

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2nd Annual HORRORPHILE - HALL OF INFAMY - 2009

June 22nd 2009 02:45

1. The Exorcist
(USA, 1973) Directed by William Friedkin

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Horror QUIZ #27: Know your zombie movie, know your vampire movie, know your werewolf movie …

June 18th 2009 23:41

I recently was sent a link through to a true or false quiz. Twenty movie titles separated into ten true or false questions. You had to decide which was a real movie title and which was the fake one. The first and last ones were the easiest: Diary of the Dead or Cookbook of the Dead? Bed of the Dead or Document of the Dead? Providing you know your George Romero movies they were dead easy. The others were a tad more difficult as the question masters had dug up some very obscure, but very real, movie titles, such as Legion of the Dead, Orgy of the Dead, Cruise Ship of the Dead, and the clincher, Nudist Colony of the Dead. Yup, it seems a lot of fly-by-night filmmakers have been very keen to try and cash in on Romero’s seminal series of exploits of the zombie kind.

It gave me inspiration to concoct a new quiz (since I haven’t posted one in nine months!). A series of straight forward multiple choice questions. But with a twist: choose the real sub-genre movie title amidst the fake ones, or is it the fake sub-genre movie amidst the real ones? You decide

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Shadow Of The Vampire

June 18th 2009 00:59

Legend has it that German Expressionist director F.W. Murnau made a Faustian pact with his star Max Schreck whilst filming one of the greatest vampire tales of all-time: Nosferatu: A Symphony of Horror (1922). If we’re to believe the events of Shadow of the Vampire (2000), Schreck was a real vampire whom Murnau believed would infuse his motion picture with an unprecedented level of authenticity and provide its silver (nitrate) lining with a supernatural kudos. In return Schreck would get the neck of his female star Greta … for real.

Director E. Elias Merhige, who made the extraordinary and otherworldly avant garde Begotten (1990) dispatches any overt surrealist touches, in favour of a more conventional style of narrative. However he elicits superbly stylized performances from the entire cast; John Malkovich revels in his usual histrionics, but brings to megalomaniacal life the role of Murnau, a tortured and driven cineaste artiste, but it is Willem Dafoe as Schreck who not only captures the role of Graf Orlock with effortlessness, but as Schreck he brings the man (rather ironically) creepily and passionately alive

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Posted By: Bryn - Category: movie reviews

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El Rey de la Montaña

June 16th 2009 02:38

The international title for this relentless, violent Spanish thriller is King Of The Hill, but I much prefer the literal translation: The King Of The Mountain, as it reminds me less of the U.S. animated comedy series which I was never a fan of. The King of the Mountain commands a darker edge and tone. Mind you I quite like the French title, which translates roughly as The Prey.

Quim (Leonardo Sbaraglia) - yes an odd name for a man - is intending to rendezvous with his girlfriend, although the relationship is strained while h econverses with her from a service station payphone. A beautiful stranger nearby, Bea (Maria Valverde) pricks up her ears, and follows him into the unisex toilets where they have urgent sex. She leaves as quickly as she arrives, stealing his wallet, and drives away. He pursues her, and makes the fateful decision to follow her car up a mountain road

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Posted By: Bryn - Category: movie reviews

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GROTESQUE UNIDENTIFIED LIFE FORM FOUND IN SEWER!	Saturn 3	Otesánek (Little Otik)
Q&A with A NIGHT OF HORROR film festival directors Dean Bertram and Lisa Mitchell	Splinter	Martyrs
2nd Annual HORRORPHILE - HALL OF INFAMY - 2009	Horror QUIZ #27: Know your zombie movie, know your vampire movie, know your werewolf movie …	Shadow Of The Vampire
El Rey de la Montaña	Død Snø (Dead Snow)	A CALL TO SEVERED ARMS! Hall of Infamy - please vote!
Pontypool	Van Diemen's Land	Paranormal Activity